7 Methods To Change Your Life When It Seems Like You Keep Failing


I've always believed that with a plan and willpower everyone has the ability to change any area of their life. But, since graduating changing my life for the better hasn't come to me as easily as it had in the past. For example, I love being an entrepreneur, but having a day job would make accomplishing certain goals more feasible. Freelancing gives me freedom, but on the downside it can be very hard to save and invest money into things when my finances are unpredictable. Unfortunately, landing a professional job has not been an easy tasks over the past 2 years no matter how much I apply well advised job hunting methods. Seeing an area of my life that I want to change and not being able to apply practical methods and simply change things has be discouraging. Some days I feel claustrophobic;  like I'm being shut in by life and I question if I'll ever make any progress beyond where I am today. After feeling like I've exhausted every job hunt method known to man, I started to think that maybe what needed to be changed is my outlook on how to incite change itself. I've narrowed down a few new methods that have helped keep me at peace and hopeful for the future even when it seems like all my plans are failing.


At times I get so caught up in wanting change that I don't take a good look at what I already have. It's nothing wrong with wanting better in your life, but maybe to achieve your next goal you have to build from where you are. Don't get too down on yourself thinking because you aren't where you want to be you haven't accomplished anything. Show gratitude as well as maximize off of the opportunities that you already have in place.


Maybe you need to go back to the drawing board. What's the "why" behind your goal?  Did you overlook somethings while planning? What have you learned from your failures? Now that you've taken an "L" or two it might be time for you rewrite your plan with your new outlook. You might discover that your old plan no longer serves you altogether and decide to go down a new path. Either way is okay. Negus Graduate started out as a YouTube channel, but thanks to a reassessment I realized I wanted to go a different route.  Don't be afraid to switch or toss your original plan.


I love being able to knock out goals back to back! But some goals take time. You can't lose weight or build a business within a day. Small goals don't always produce that same feeling of accomplishment as when I complete big goals. Although some tasks are small the results can be huge. Working out daily or saving $5 a week are all small things that if continuously done can make a big impact. Some of the big goals that I have not accomplished in the past were due to the fact that I underestimated the power of smaller tasks. Don't overlook the little guy or feel like if you're aren't doing huge things daily you aren't making moves. 


As a blogger I have to check in on the results of my readership and social media activity often. But, too much focus on the results can be counteractive. You'll know when you're too focused on results when things become way more stressful that it is fun or when you constantly check the stats. Results aren't all bad. You want to be able to review them and learn what worked and what didn't'; you just don't want to let them burn you out. While being focused solely on results I noticed I became highly anxious and sad. I was always hard on myself about not doing enough even though I was actually doing all I could. I thought lack of yielding the results I wanted meant I wasn't good enough. Truth is all you can do is your best and realize that the results are out of your hand after that. If you reach your goals that's great, but if not don't beat yourself up about it. 


Many times in my life when things didn't work out it would be later revealed to me that it was a blessing in disguise. Sometimes the job that I couldn't understand why I didn't get I'd later learn the boss was overbearing. There have been times when I learned that a guy that I once admired would have been a horrible match for me. Understanding these things later on helped me better accept that not getting them was a dodged bullet. Unfortunately sometimes it's months and even years before it's revealed to me why that thing I wanted didn't work out. But, still it's caused me to think about the unforeseen reasons why it's sometimes better to be told "no". We just have to learn to let go and trust that what's meant for us will find us. 


Things not changing despite my persistent efforts has made me feel trapped within a certain level of life. Every month I set goals for change and as it continuously doesn't happen I begin to feel helpless. But here's a secret... THAT'S NOT TRUE. I only feel stuck and helpless because I have become wrapped up in thinking there is only 1 way for my goals to be reached. Sure, I prefer to have a day job, but what if I'm meant to get better at entrepreneurship without it? Or maybe I could try an internship or fellowship. It could be the same for your goals. When you try different things you open yourself up to endless possibilities. Get on google and you'll find a world of new things to try. Even if you don't hit your exact goal, your chances of landing somewhere just as desirable are more likely than it would being focused on things working out only one way.


You can't avoid all obstacles, but you can control how you approach them. You can start by asking yourself are your obstacles really obstacles. Sometimes a challenge seems way bigger in our mind that it is. When dealing with obstacles try doing research, getting creative and being patient. There are some projects I've put on the back burner because I couldn't afford the software needed to move forward with them. I had to learn instead of giving up once I saw the price tag, I needed to do research and see if I could find an alternative route with an affordable price. With a few google searches my "big" issues were solved. I've also had to learn patience. When I want something I usually go for it with a very direct approach, but that doesn't always work and sometimes it yields the very opposite results. Now I'm learning the power of manifestation. Somethings in life we want are life butterflies. We have to know that if we are calm and still they will come to us. Some doors in life have opened for me because I was doing the work within myself.

Learning to approach change in this way is challenging. Failing isn't fun especially when you have tried everything you can think of. I often have to remind myself of these steps when I start to feel anxiety or discouragement. Remember that you aren't stuck and there is reason behind why things aren't going as planned. Maybe in the future you'll even thank God for going through this season. In order to get change instead of running directly towards it, it might take a step at a time and before you know it your entire environment will changed. JUST KEEP WALKING IN FAITH.